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Selecting the perfect lube for anal sex – and why it´s important

How do you prepare yourself for anal sex? What do you need to know about enemas? Is it safe to have anal sex? These are some of the most frequently asked questions from people interested in learning more about anal sex, and there’s a lot of conflicting information out there. This article is part one of our series about one of the most intimate ways of penetration.

Lube 101

Obviously, you want to use enough lube – and this could be a whole series by itself. Of course, we can only speak from our own experience and preferences, so you should feel free to try out some of the lubes that you already love using.

But there are some differences in lubes that we do want to talk about here. Some people say, water-based lubes would be the ideal solution because they can be used with condoms. Which is obviously very important to avoid any STDs. But water-based lubes are being absorbed by the rectum canal way quicker than oil- or silicone-based lubes.

Silicone lubes are perfect because they are really smooth and have a silky texture, making it long lasting and you don´t have to re-apply lube every few minutes. But they can damage toys you are using to pleasure yourself (or your partner*s) anally.

So oil-based might be the best option here? Yes, but only if you are not using condoms, which contain latex. Oil-based lubricants will damage latex, and can turn your good intentions for safe sex into a disaster with a life-lasting effect.

So in short:
Using water-based lubes is safe for toys and condoms, but it will be absorbed quickly and you might want to re-apply it several times in your session.

Silicone-based lubes are a perfect choice if you are using condoms or anything else that is not made out of silicone.

Oil-based lubricants are perfect if you are only using toys, like strap-on cocks, dildos, vibrators, and so on.

As you can see, just a bit of planning is necessary in order to select the right lube for your anal adventures. Because every kind of lube has it´s own advantages and disadvantages, having a selection of different lubes around is always a good idea.

One more thing:

Some people like using lubes that contain substances to de-sensitize the rectum. It may sound like a great idea for the beginner, but at the same time, it can cause you to beg for more, deeper, harder penetration than your body is prepared for.

Also, you should avoid chemical ingredients that are sometimes mixed in to make the lube smell like watermelon, taste like chocolate (yes, such lubes exist), or anything in between. Those ingredients could cause skin reactions like rashes, and we are quite certain that you want to avoid those all costs when it comes to your butthole.

What´s your favorite, you may wonder?

I personally love the products from the brand “Pjur”, because their lube feels just really silky, is made without any weird chemicals and it also softens your skin. They make lubes for all kinds of activities in the bedroom, and there are even a few different choices for anal play. Pjur Backdoor is the lasting, silicone-based version and the Pjur Toy Lube is a hybrid version that is absolutely safe to use with both toys and latex condoms.

Whichever lube you use, remember to not be greedy with it! Even the silkiest of lubes should still be applied well to make the experience much more fun!

Filed under: Health


Emma has lived in a gay relationship for 12 years, as a husband to his wife for another 15 years, and is now living with her girlfriend in a small town in Northern Germany.


  1. Shai says

    I am so glad I read this because I played with my dildo anally the other night and realized the lube I was using wasn’t good for it. Thank you for this knowledgeable blog. I am definitely going to buy some of the lube you suggested thank you ❤️

    • Cherie Adele says

      That’s so wonderful to hear! Let us know what you think! <3