Wax play can be an incredibly sensual, intensely erotic experience—but it can also be dangerous if you don’t know what you’re doing or if you’re doing it with the wrong person. Wax play is best done with a partner… or two… rather than alone, but it is possible to enjoy wax play alone.
It should include things like a safe word, trusted partners, and an understanding of safe temperature limits and areas of the body to avoid spilling wax onto. Anyone who has ever been burned during the act of wax play can agree that there are a few very important things to remember when planning and engaging in such a heated sensual act! We are here to share some important things to help you avoid burns and make the most of your wax play adventures.
The key to a successful and safe wax play experience is preparation. Here are our top 10 things you should know before you get started:
- Choose the right type of wax. There are many different types of wax available, but not all are suitable for use on the skin. Be sure to choose a wax that is specifically designed for body use and is nontoxic.
Soy, shea butter, and paraffin are more versatile and safe because they melt at a lower temperature than most other varieties of wax.
Stearin, beeswax, and microcrystalline wax should be avoided because they burn at higher temperatures and can easily cause burns—especially on more sensitive areas like the pubic area and armpits.
We love massage wax candles because they provide a fun mix of intensity from the hot wax dripping on the body that quickly cools down to soothing sensations of warm soft wax that can easily transition into a nice massage. We also love massage candle wax, because the amount of clean-up tends to be easier as there are fewer pieces of hard wax all over the place as they fall off of the body after the wax dries. It also allows for an easy transition into other fun activities without needing to clean in between. - The shape and container of your candle wax are also very important. You want to avoid candles that tapper (small to big). Long straight candles such as pillar and stick candles that do not tapper are generally the best option.
If you use a massage candle in a glass or metal container, make sure you blow the flame out before you pour it over your partner(s). Glass can crack! Think how terrible it would be to have hot wax and shattered glass all over you or your partner(s) ….OUCH! - Have a burn safety kit, water, and a wet towel ready just in case things go south. Remember, you are playing with fire here and accidents can and do happen to even the most experienced of kinksters. Nothing ruins the mood more than having to call the fire department to put out a house fire, or an ambulance take you or your playmate(s) to the ER for 3rd-degree burns.
For more experienced kinksters who enjoy living more on the edge, keeping the flame of your candle lit can be more intense—especially if you and your partner are comfortable with the flame breezing by bare skin (keep fire AWAY from hair). For beginners, we strongly advise letting your candle wax build up and blow the flame out before you pour the wax. - Test the temperature of the wax before you start dripping it onto your playmate(s) during a session. The higher you drip the wax from, the cooler it will be when it hits the body. Dripping from about an arms-length is generally a good starting point. Take some time to explore this with your partner(s) before you actually engage in a session. This will help everyone feel confident and comfortable with enjoying the moment.
- Wax play can be very messy to clean up. We do not recommend playing with wax on your favorite bed sheets. Be prepared to put on fresh sheets afterward. If you plan on playing in an open space, make sure to put down a drop cloth or material over your floors to avoid damaging them—dried wax is NOT fun to clean out of carpets! Also, make sure to get off as much dried wax before you enter the shower, so you don’t clog your drains.
- Don’t wax on broken or damaged skin. One of the most important things to remember when it comes to wax play is that you should never wax on broken skin. This means that any cuts, scrapes, or open wounds should be avoided at all costs. Not only is this incredibly painful, but it also increases the risk of infection. If you have any cuts or scrapes, make sure to cover them with a bandage and communicate where they are to your partner before you start your wax play session.
- Body hair can be sexy, but you might want to think about shaving a day or two before you engage in wax play because it can be very painful to remove after it dries! Another option would be to just avoid areas with body hair.
- Use a blindfold! It can be a fun way to add suspense to the moment while also protecting your partner’s eyes from any small drips of wax that may splash. We do not recommend dripping wax on or near the face!
- Speaking of areas to avoid—it is not advisable to drip wax onto genitalia, or inside body cavities like the vagina or anus. Be aware that areas like the armpits and the inner thighs are very sensitive as well.
- When engaging in any sort of BDSM play, it’s important to keep consent and communication at the forefront. This is especially true when it comes to wax play. Wax play can be an incredibly sensual and erotic experience, but it’s also important to remember that it can also be dangerous if not done correctly.
Wax play can be a wonderful way to enjoy taking things to the next level as long as you know the basics! Remember, you are playing with fire! The more you know before you try it, the more likely it will be an experience you will want to repeat and explore more in-depth! And don’t forget the aftercare! Snuggles, hugs, and water go a long way!
Sugar and Spice.
Cherie is a stray children's librarian turned rogue.
Now she spends her days writing and exploring sex-positive, queer, and kink topics with her girlfriend.
You might find her covered in paint, laughing, or dancing in the rain.
Cherie is a stray children's librarian turned rogue.
Now she spends her days writing and exploring sex-positive, queer, and kink topics with her girlfriend.
You might find her covered in paint, laughing, or dancing in the rain.
Latest posts by Cherie Adele (see all)
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- Wax Play 101: A Brief Introduction to the Sensual Art of Wax Play - July 14, 2022